The Joy Luck Club

The Joy Luck Club is a nickname my four girlfriends and I started calling ourselves after 12 years of trials and tribulations in our treasured friendship. We have also joked that we are Sex in the Suburbs kind of friends. Phuong, Kat, Karen and Kim are all college friends of mine from our halcyon days at the UW. We shyly introduced ourselves back in 1994 and tittered through most of our Accelerated Vietnamese 214 classes, taught by an actual professor from Hanoi. It was not a Vietnamese language class per se, but more of a reading and writing mentorship for expatriates who could speak the language but not decipher any accent marks beyond the elementary perusal of a restaurant menu- and only because there were pictures of the traditional foods we most loved to eat. Out of that class, a small but tight group of both guys and girls clung together over the years, savoring the fact that we all had the shared experience of straddling two cultures. We used to call ourselves simply, "The 214". Other 214 classes in subsequent quarters could not match our camaraderie or bravado, so we became known as "THE 214". Our group became legendary for our massive dinner parties, playing hooky for coffee and bagels, nights passed out on each other's floors, spontaneous ski trips, muddy flag football games, clubbing, biking the Burke-Gilman en masse, etc. Now we are all old and married with children, but it could be said that we grew up together. As the years marched on, it was mostly the girls who stayed in touch. We let the guys tag along only because two of the girls, Kat and Karen, ended up marrying two of the guys.

I will tell you that these friends of mine have become so near and dear to me that they are like family. Together, we have weathered graduation, breakups, family tragedies, marriages, births, everything that a family might go through together. These friends were there for me when my mom passed away and they have been steadfast friends all these years. There is a joy in knowing that our kids are growing up together and could become the next generation of friends. And we are also celebrating the most recent announcement of Kim's long-awaited pregnancy and Lam's upcoming wedding. They were the last holdouts in their respective departments. There has been so much laughter and fun over the years, but we've also been there for each other in the darkest moments. We all have strong supportive families of our own, but somehow the fact that we have this extended, extra family has been a comfort and boon to us. Visiting each other's houses, playing with each other's kids, makes us feel that we have arrived in our parents' shoes somehow. Instead of being the kids running around having fun and sitting at the kids' table, WE are now the adults. How could a bunch of crazy college buddies have foreseen this?

These are the same friends who have taken me to treatment, made food to drop off at the house during my convalescence, brought me bunches of flowers, told me funny stories to keep me laughing, and have cheered me on during my recovery. They have been there in good times and they are certainly here for me now during my worst of days. Kat even stopped by the other day and gave me a pedicure and manicure while I drowsed away after taking my pain meds. Phuong made me the tuna salad I craved and brought peanut butter & jelly too. Kim, in her beautiful glowing maternal state, made a fantastic apple & arugula salad from a Bon Appetit recipe. Karen, despite devoting herself to a sister who recently suffered from an aneurism, also brought food and her unflagging sense of optimism. I am lucky enough to have these women as friends for life, and we have all pledged to grow old together. With friends like these, I intend to keep up my end of the bargain. We are The Joy Luck Club by definition.